Oh god, wow. This marks the first time I have ever wanted to punch Mark Gatiss in the fucking mouth.
Here’s my take on the “rat, wedding, bow” thing.
Rat obviously means Peter Pettigrew is up to no good again. Fucker probably had some horcruxes hidden away as crates of moldy cheese. So the first episode of series three will focus on Sherlock coming out of hiding to solve the mystery of why there are wizards in London.
Wedding—come on, guys, what could it be if not Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger? Sherlock and John travel to Canada to try and deduce why Nickelback is so shitty.
And lastly, bow: This one’s a bit fuzzy, but I get the feeling it’s related to James Bond, who reveals his true name to be Sebastian Moran.
Beware, you will laugh, you may also blush.